In this post we look at purity and love relationships and why the least we could do now is to begin being pure for our current or future spouse.
So you’ve slept with someone before? Or you've
compromised sexually? Or you haven’t done anything physically but you've
fantasized or engaged in pornography? Which means you’re still technically
pure, right?
Let’s look at why being “technically” pure isn't a
real thing…
“She does him (her husband) good, all the days
of her life.” Prov31:12.
Not beginning the day she marries him or
falls in love with him or meets him; ALL the days. So even at this very moment
one should be faithful to your current or future spouse…
Just think about it. If you have compromised and are
still “technically” pure you still sit with feelings of guilt or shame. Don’t
agree with me? Well, would you tell someone you have just met exactly how far
you and your partner have gone? Didn’t think so. You are most probably
suppressing those feelings of shame and guilt or justifying what you’ve done by
hiding behind “I haven’t had sex yet, so I am still a virgin.”
Purity doesn’t work like that. As said in Part One,
purity is about more than just the physical – it’s a matter of the heart. And
shame and guilt are chains that the enemy has around your heart and he is
slowly but surely suffocating your inner beauty and freedom by convincing you
that you are condemned, unworthy of being called clean, and undeserving of
forgiveness and a godly relationship.
You might not even be aware of these feelings yet, but
they will, and most probably are, surface in your relationship with your
partner and even your relationship with yourself.
So it comes down to being faithful to your future
spouse before you even meet them. Don’t compromise; don’t expose yourself to
things that could trigger thoughts about lust or addictions to it. These
examples may not seem very harmful, but that’s exactly what the enemy does – he
comes quietly and plants little seeds in your minds about minor things, and
then, with enough exposure to these toxic things, these seeds grow and grow
until it shows its roots in your life… And the funny thing is that the enemy
even convinces you that it’s your fault – that he had nothing to do with it –
and YOU sit with the guilt (I hate what I’ve done) and shame (I hate me)… Thus,
prevention is better than cure they say: don’t compromise; don’t expose
yourself to things that could trigger thoughts about lust or addictions to it.
Do you want to spend the rest of your life with
someone who is insecure to a point where you have to try and convince them
every day of their beauty and worth? Someone who hates themselves behind the
mask they wear? Someone who has anger and bitterness in them about what they
have done and is constantly taking it out on you or others?
I guess not. Then if you don’t want someone like that,
then surely you shouldn’t be like that either… Cause your spouse wouldn’t want
someone like that either…unless you decide NOW to be pure. And yes, it is
possible – regardless of your past. That is a fact. Be the person you want to meet.
In Part Three we will look at how YOU can be PURE.
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